Just a little background……I had my daughter Taylor when I was 18 years old and unmarried. Three years after I had her I wanted another baby so bad, but I wanted to do it the right way. I wanted to have a child in the right order…..get married, then have a child. In December 2002, I got married to the man of my dreams, Jeremy. In February 2003, we found out we were pregnant with Jackson. As with every baby, Jackson was wanted SO much. It was so amazing having him. Even though he did put up a fight, 27 hours of labor finally ended in a c-section. He was 9 pounds 7 ounces; big boy, with TONS of hair. He had to have a haircut almost once a month. It grew so fast!! He looks just like his daddy. He learned so much in his short 5 months here. In fact, the night before he passed away, he finally rolled from his tummy to his back.

On March 26th, at 7:45 am, I dropped my son Jackson off at his daycare. His daycare provider is my best friend’s mom who does daycare in her home. Jackson always goes back down for his morning nap about 8:30 am. I got to work at 9:00 am and immediately got the news. Cheri, Jackson’s babysitter, went to check on Jackson 20 minutes after he went down for a nap and he was not breathing. She immediately called 911 and then my husband. My husband had taken that day off to do landscaping in our front yard. He was only 10 minutes away. Jeremy, my husband, rushed over to the house to see Jackson. The police and fire department would not let him in the house. They had to care flight Jackson to Children’s Hospital (we lived in Dallas, Texas). I work an hour away and my boss’ wife rushed me to the hospital. When we pulled up to the hospital and I ran into the ER, I heard the helicopter land. At that moment, when I heard the helicopter, I wanted to scale the building and run and grab my son. This could not be happening to me; this kind of stuff does not happen to me or my family. All of our family members and friends were there at the hospital for us. I have no idea how long we were in the ER. I had lost all track of time since the moment I got the phone call.

They were able to get a heartbeat, but the doctor told us it didn’t look good. Once Jackson was stable, Jeremy and I were able to go in and hold his hand and kiss him. It was so hard to see my beautiful baby boy hooked up to every machine and poked with every needle; but I knew all of that was to help him. His temperature was 88 degrees. Once he was stable enough, they took him up to the ICU. The doctors came and took my husband and I into a room and gave us the news; my son was brain dead. He then used a bunch of big medical terms. We had to make the hardest decision of our lives. We had to decide to let our son go or let the doctors do everything they could to keep his little heart beating; but that eventually, in a couple days, he was going to pass. We couldn’t do that to our son. Our son’s body had already gone through enough and he needed to be with his Heavenly Father.

Once my husband and I made that decision to let Jackson’s spirit go, the hospital let us get his hand print and foot prints and let me cut a lock of hair. I have the hair from his first haircut and I have the hair from his last haircut. Jackson has an 8-year-old sister, Taylor. Jackson thinks his sister is the funniest thing in the world. Taylor was able to participate in helping get his hand and foot prints. When we were ready to take him off the machines, my husband, my daughter and myself were able to hold him as he passed away. I was able to rock him one last time. I have no idea how long we were in that room and I don’t know what time he passed, but it seemed we were in there for a lifetime. The doctor told us his heart would beat for a little while after they took him off the machines. They did give him some morphine to make sure he wouldn’t experience any pain. The doctor came back in the room, sometime later, and checked for a heartbeat. He then let us know that he has passed. He said the time, but I didn’t hear anything at that moment. I will never forget how sweet and how peaceful my baby looked when he passed away. This has been very hard on my husband and I and Taylor. It was so hard to come home to Jackson’s things all over the house and the dirty bottles in the sink.

Jackson was the healthiest happiest little boy. God sent him to Jeremy and me to take care of for 5 months. Jackson is my little Angel now.
*Jackson passed away due to SIDS.
-Heidi Carter

Glory Babies Group: Longview